Gender, Gender Identity, and Sexual Orientation

What a difficult topic for me this week! However, it has allowed me to think deeper about children's feelings about their family structure. Even with my difficulty with homosexuality, I do feel as if we need to make all children feel proud of their family, even if they are not the traditional family.

When I think of homosexuality and preschools, I believe it is not represented because it is such a taboo subject to discuss with people, especially young children. When I read the questions for this blog assignment, it prompted me to think about my own classroom and the books I have in my classroom library. None of my books represent families that are gays or lesbians. Many of my books do not show complete families; at times, some of the books actually only show a mother but no other family members. I also spoke with my school librarian, and there are no books that represent diverse families. Next, I decided to look at my kindergarten teachers' books, and the same applied. When I asked the teacher about this, she stated this is such a touchy subject, especially for such a small school. She stated she did not want to put her job in jeopardy as this is something that is not spoken of to young children (Y. Sanchez, personal communication, 2013). The preschools I have seen, as well as my own classroom, do not depict any type of family other than the typical family; a mother and a dad. I began thinking about dramatic play centers, and decided to talk to one of my friends that had been a preschool teacher for 20 years. She said she was always homophobic, and refused to talk about something she knew was wrong in the eyes of the Lord (S. Cardenas, personal communication, 2013). When prompted with the question of how this made children feel that came from homosexual parents, she simply could not talk about this type of family with her students; she could not teach something that she knew was so wrong, even if the child was not at fault for what type of family they were born in to (S. Cardenas, personal communication, 2013). I do believe schools and stores are focused on the heterosexual family, rather than the diversity of all families because of the discomfort it may cause someone, as well as the confrontation they may face from other families.

I am very uncomfortable with homosexuality because of my strong Christian faith; however, I never want a child to feel as if they and their family structure is not as important as their peers. Should I have a parent come to me with their concerns about someone being a homosexual or transgender teaching children, I would assure them a person's sexual orientation has nothing to do with their teaching ability, and their child is in no danger of being harmed by this person. Second, I would also remind them they are only assuming this person has this sexual orientation, and that making assumptions can certainly harm someone's reputation. I would also make sure I have research and articles on this very subject and go over this with parents. I would also stress to parents how important it is to talk about diversity and acceptance.

My daughter is in the 8th grade, and everyone has assumed one of her teachers is gay; it has never been confirmed. I have never thought negative feelings about him teaching my daughter because he is an amazing teacher, as well as being my daughter's favorite this year. I have never focused on this as I believe the person's sexual orientation has nothing to do with their ability to teach.

I am very thankful we can be honest and open throughout this course. While I know how important it is to make all children feel proud of their family, I find it quite difficult to discuss same sex parents. I am inclined to agree with the fact that early childhood centers avoid the inclusion of books that depict homosexuality as it is not what a typical family is made up of. However, I feel very torn as a family is made up of those who love you and support you. In the media presentation, it is discussed how it is important to discuss gay and lesbian parents so children can be respectful (Laureate Education, 2010). I believe this is important as all children need to learn to be respectful to all adults. My biggest concern, however, is how to accomplish this without offending all other families.

I think back to Tina, (Laureate Education, 2010) and her family never speaking of homosexuality. I never spoke about with my daughter as a young child either; it is just a difficult topic for me because of the discomfort I have with.


References

Laureate Education, Inc. (Producer). (2010).Learning from another’s life story (Video webcast). In EDUC 6357 Diversity, development, and learning.Retrieved from http://mym.cdn.laureate-media.com/2dett4d/Walden/EDUC/6357/CH/mm/audio_player/index_week3.html

 

Laureate Education, Inc. (Producer). (2010). Start Seeing Diversity. (DVD). In EDUC 6357 Diversity, Development, and Learning. Retrieved from https://class.waldenu.edu/webapps/portal/frameset.jsp?tab_tab_group_id=_2_1&url=%2Fwebapps%2Fblackboard%2Fexecute%2Flauncher%3Ftype%3DCourse%26id%3D_2098819_1%26url%3D

Professional Hopes and Goals

One hope I have when working with children, their families, and diversity is to ensure they are welcomed with no biases or oppressions. I would encourage families to continue with their day to day routines, home languages, and traditions, remembering to never make them feel as if they are wrong or feel guilty about it. My hope is children, families, and diversity is embraced within all schools and facilities around the world.

One professional goal I would like to set for the early childhood field would be to encourage all educators to study diversity and the importances of embracing it. I would speak to people I directly work with and discuss with them how beneficial it is to embrace diversity. I would ensure all cultures are respected and valued, and encourage the use of home languages, all while ensuring trusting relationships are being built.

This class has certainly been a difficult one for me; having to refer back to my childhood and the things I went through has been very difficult. However, by studying the numerous resources and having discussions with classmates, I have come to realize I have biases I must let go of. My past has influenced my future, and has allowed me to become a better person as well as a better educator. For that, I am thankful.

Thank you to each classmate that has read my postings and commented on them. I am thankful you all were very respectful and kind throughout this course. I pray many blessings upon each of you! Have a Merry Christmas and a great break!

Hope to "see" you all in future classes!!

Blessings,
Susan

Welcoming Families From Around The World

The country I chose would be Russia. I know absolutely nothing about this country, and I would like to see what their traditions and cultures are.

To prepare this family for easy transition, I would do the following:

*Do my homework (research) on their cultures so I can ensure children have an easy transition and I can incorporate this culture into my classroom.

*I would prepare my students by discussing our new student's culture, as well as differences and similarities. I would show my students pictures of this child's home, and what they would be leaving behind. We would discuss how we can ensure our new student will feel loved and nurtured, and make a list (with pictures) of the things we can do. I would also make sure we had things around the classroom that this child can relate to. For example, at centers I could also label it with familiar pictures from Russia that would have the same American meaning; anything that will help this child feel little stress and more comfort.

*I would research the language of this country. I would make sure I could say a few things should this student not know English. I would make sure this student did not feel bad about not knowing English. I would help her embrace her language and feel proud of it. This will also aid me in making her cubby and locker labels, as well as any other type of label she may need to see, as well as any literature that will need to go home.

*I would schedule a time to meet with this entire family. I would welcome them into our school and my classroom; we would take a tour, show the family where everything is, as well as meet everyone in the school. This would help calm any fears or anxities about a new place. I would also ensure the family I would be available at any time.

*I would encourage the family to share their goals and expectations for their child. Since this a different country, I would want to know what their previous country's education system was like, and what type of goals it had. When we discuss this, we can come together and make a plan for their child to be successful.

With this family moving to a different country that is unknown to them can be scary as well as stressful, especially with a small child who will be attending a school they know nothing about. Hopefully, with creating a nurturing environment as well as opening those lines of communication will aid in a successful transition. For me, this would benefit me because I could embrace diversity by celebrating it within my classroom. By creating a diverse classroom, this child can feel comfortable in her new environment as well as feel proud of where she is from.

The Personal Side of Bias, Prejudice, and Oppression

I always refer back to my husband and the incident that happened to him in a department store. He was literally followed around once he walked in. (I believe this was because he was African American!) I, on the other hand was never given a second look. My husband just wanted to do some shopping and he felt like a criminal. He would never take anything that did not belong to him, and he was very hurt that someone would assume he was a thief because of the color of his skin. This entire incident made him feel inferior and he also thought the clerk may have felt superior to him because she was caucasian.

As my husband's wife, my first feeling was anger. I was so upset that someone would assume something because of his skin color. That should never be an issue. After I calmed down, and spoke to the lady about her actions, I actually felt empowered because I let her know what she did was racist, and she should be ashamed of herself. I felt sorry for her because she could not see past my husband's skin color to see what an amazing man he is!

I believe this lady would have to change to prevent this from happening again. However, if she was raised this way, it may not happen. There is a common saying, "You cannot teach an old dog new tricks." Sad as it is to say, many people were raised to believe things about other races, and it is has been embedded in their head for so many years that it is virtually impossible to change.

I feel very blessed to be married to a man that I love with all of my heart. I feel blessed that God sent him to me, and if someone cannot see past his skin color, that is their loss. It is so unfortunate that so many people still have this mind set. There are so many people in this world that are missing out on wonderful friendships!!

Microaggressions.....

As I observed many people this week, I found myself thinking of the many microaggressions that were taking place, although done unintentionally, it made me become very aware of my own thoughts and words.

During a high school basketball game I overheard some ladies talking. I was taken aback at what they were saying, but I did not interrupt as I wanted to see what they would continue saying. The opposing team was warming up before the game started, and one lady made the comment that one of their boys walked somewhat "funny." As the conversation went on, these ladies came to the conclusion that this young man was probably gay because of the way he walked and the way he held a basketball. I was so shocked that someone could make that type of comment about someone they knew absolutely nothing about! As a matter of fact, they had never even laid eyes on this young man! After a few minutes of listening to them go on and on about this young man, I intervened and explained to them they were labeling him and this was a form of microaggression. I told each of them that was unfair to even assume something about someone because of the way he walked! I also explained to both ladies the psychological damage they could do to this young man had he overheard their conversation. After I was done talking, I do believe these two ladies may never speak to me again, but I wanted to make my point known!

A second microaggression I wanted to share was about my husband (I actually discussed it in my discussion posting). Years ago he and I went to a department store. We walked in together, but we split up because he was looking for something in particular. I actually watched a salesperson literally follow him around as if he was going to steal something. She never once followed me, but she certainly made it a point to be in very close proximity with my African American husband. We both were so offended, and I actually told her such. She never once apologized, and we walked out to never return. For me, that type of racial microaggression is totally unnecessary. Just because someone's skin tone is a certain color does not mean they are a thief.

We must be very careful to ensure we do not stereotype people, or become prejudice or show discrimination because of someone's skin color, where they live, or any other aspect of their life.

Perspectives on Diversity and Culture

I asked three different people about their definitions of culture, and they all seem to agree their culture was their race, their heritage, and their traditions. When I asked about their sexual orientation, they seemed shocked because they didn't think that applied to their culture or even diversity. They believed that was one's own choice, and had nothing to do with their culture.

When asked about diversity, one of my co-workers said she believed diversity meant our differences, and how we deal with those. She also went on to say being different doesn't mean it is a bad thing, and we need to teach others about diversity.

As I sat and reflected on culture and diversity, as well as talking with a couple of my closest friends, the topic of differences was brought up as far as couples. I am very traditional girl, and although I don't agree with certain things, I believe everyone should be treated with respect. All children should be made to feel proud of their families, even if they are different.

Being a homosexual couple has been a topic we have not discussed in depth. This has been omitted, and I am sure it is a topic many do not want to even think about. As I previously mentioned, it is not something I agree with, but I never want one of my students to feel ashamed of who they are. A child should never be held accountable for what decisions an adult makes. We, as ECE professionals have a duty to take care of our students, and we should not add damage to them by making negative references about their parents, their home life, or their culture. After talking to my friends and co-workers about culture and diversity, I know I must accept the differences of others, and learn to push my personal feelings aside and dow hat is best for my students. I want students to remember what a positive difference I made, and to never feel as if I made them feel bad for who they are.

Blessings,
Susan

My Family Culture

This is quite an assignment. I actually sat and contemplated what was most important in my life, and nothing materialistic made the list. However, if I had to take three concrete objects, it would be my cell phone, (although I doubt it would work where I was going) because it holds many photos and addresses of those I could keep in contact with; a photo album to help me remember faces; and certainly the most important concrete object: my Bible. I would need this to remain close to God as I know we need to dwelve into scripture daily.

If I had to choose one thing, it would be my Bible. I have my internal memory to look back at pictures and important events in my life. I would feel pretty lost without my phone, but I would manage. I need God's word, and I couldn't leave it behind. His word is a guide for us all, and helps us remember what we should be doing.

As I mentioned previously, my phone would probably not work, and it would be almost useless other than for looking at pictures and addresses. Again, I would have my internal memory to reflect back upon. 

As I sat and thought of this assignment, I realized my family is far more important than any concrete object. I love my photos, especially those of my husband and daughter, but those can be replaced. My family, and our God is what is most important.

Blessings,
Susan