This student had a difficult day at school; he refused to follow directions; he was pushing other students; and he slapped a girl on the playground during recess. Because of his behavior, he had consequences. I marked this in his discipline folder, and when school was dismissed, I spoke with his mother about his behavior. During our conversation, he tried to interrupt, but his mother politely asked him to remain quiet for a few moments while we spoke. She was very sweet and showed no anger.
After the parent and I were finished, she began talking to her son. It was not a "You are in trouble when you get home;" rather, it was a question and answer time. She asked her son to explain to her why he had this type of day. She listened to him without interrupting him, and she let him explain to her why he displayed this type of behavior. She never got angry or irritated with him, but she let him talk and then explained to him why it was wrong to hit and not behave. I was so impressed with the gentle nature of this mother, and equally impressed at the mutual respect among the two.
This conversation taught me a valuable lesson; to always show respect to children (even if they are only 4 years old0 and let them actually have a voice in the conversation rather than make them feel as if they are not allowed to communicate. In order to gain respect, it must be given as well. I realize I need to do a better job of communicating, and allowing my children to speak more while I listen more.
References
Laureate Education Inc.(Producer). (2011). Communicating With Young Children. Baltimore, MD: Author
Susan,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your observation. It seems we both had similar situations happen, but the parent in your class dealt with the concern in a much more positive way. Mutual respect is so important between an adult and child.
Alissa
Hi,
ReplyDeleteShowing children is a very important thing. Just because they are young that does not mean they do not understand what respect is. When teachers or parents show students respect, they appreciate and communicate with them more.
It is nice to hear of these cordial conversations. Often times while I am out about in town I see adults speaking down to young children. They talk to them as if they are stupid and wouldn't understand if spoken to in a normal tone. I do understand that adults get frustrated with children very easily. I think the best thing to do in that situation is to remove yourself and come back to the conversation later.
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